Polter-Cow (spectralbovine) wrote,

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Why Is He the Only One with an English Accent?

Battlestar Galactica is back! But in order to prepare yourself, you must click these links.

"A New Crew in Town" is the funniest BSG-related thing I have EVER SEEN. And it's on the GODSDAMN OFFICIAL SITE. You have to watch it. It's briliantly hilarious. Comparably brilliant is "Lazy Friday," which I am still very proud of and think should be a Huge Internet Sensation. Much like this comic adaptation of the five-minute BSG miniseries by kiwikazoo. Finally, I was amused to discover that the official site is selling this shirt.

Okay, are you done laughing? Because you better be done laughing, since BSG isn't funny. Ever.

It was really, really lovely to hear my beloved prologue music again. They changed the visuals, but they were appropriate changes. But, God, I love that music.

The first act started out pretty strong. I think Starbuck killing Leoben and then quietly sitting down to eat dinner with one blood-stained hand was the best part of the episode. And...I mean both episodes. Because that scene wowed me and made me think, "Okay, maybe this show can woo me back." It helped, of course, that they used "Passacaglia."

For the larger part of the remaining hours, though, I was both annoyed and uncomfortable with the RIDICULOUSLY BLATANT parallels with the Bush administration and the current political environment. Yes, I know the show has been doing this for two years, making commentary on the world we live in, the dark side of the world we live in. But at this point, it's become a really depressing Daily Show. If I wanted to watch the news, I'd watch the news. Suicide bombings? Check. People being led into detention camps with bags over their heads? Check. President denying any reports of torture? Check. Everything being done in the name of God? Check. I'm fairly stupid and apolitical and don't pay attention to current events and even I could see it.

And speaking of seeing, file this under Things I Don't Need to See: Ellen Tigh having sex with Dean Stockwell. Although Ellen got some extra layers to her character in these episodes, so that was nice. She's now a Cylon-frakker.

I love Cavill, though. I really, really like that all the Cylons have very distinct, different personalities, and the clashes among them were highlights, especially because you get cute shots of the multiple clones. But they also highlighted a basic problem I had with the finale. What the frak are they frakking doing? They decided to subjugate the human race...in the name of God? If, as Cavill says, they're here to bring the Word of God, why aren't we seeing any preachers or churches or proselytizing? What does God want for the heathen human race and their Lords of Kobol? I don't understand! I also liked that Six and Eight have retained their "Downloaded" experience and are trying to bring a more enlightened "Um, maybe God doesn't want us to KILL EVERYONE SO MUCH" point of view to the table.

I do wonder about Caprica Six, though, who proclaimed her love for Baltar and then got SHOT IN THE FUCKING HEAD. Was she an anomaly? Will she be reborn just as she was? Do the other Sixes love Baltar? Someone needs to punch Doral in the face for killing Six like that, because you DON'T DO THAT.

Speaking of things you don't do: IS EVERYONE FRAKKING MARRIED NOW? Lee and Dualla got married? Sharon and Helo got married? Okay, that one I buy, but I'll miss hearing them say "Sharon Valerii," because that was a cool name.

Then there's Starbuck's baby, or whatever that is. Because the Cylon-human hybrids are the shit. This creepy arrangement with Leoben is...creepy. He's very patient, too, after getting killed five times. You'd think he'd take the hint. Starbuck's not going to love you, dude. Except when the kid trips and falls or something, and she squeezes your hand because children make the ovaries pulsate.

Gaeta got pretty cool, too, being the Mysterious Informant That Couldn't Possibly Be the Human Closest to the President. Okay, I didn't guess it was him until he started running like hell through the streets of New Caprica, which was a cool scene.

You know, a lot of shit happened in these two episodes. They packed them full of lots of intertwining, complicated subplots.

Also: Lee got FAT, yo. I was not even prepared. Poor Jamie Bamber. Look at that gut!

So. I appreciate what they're doing here. But I don't love it. This isn't the show I signed up for, you know? I liked it more when they were on the run from the Cylons. And I understand that they tried to shake things up, and I will admit this is the ballsiest show on television. And this whole resistance thing and human revolution thing could be very, very cool. But this show hasn't wooed me back just yet. I still like it. I think. I know I'm supposed to, after all. The show is still a phenomenal technical achievement; I love the production value, the look and sound of the show. And I want to see what's going to happen and where this story is going. I don't know. I don't deal well with change, and this is a big change.

Oh, Battlestar Galactica. I love the slanted walls in your A-shaped halls. I...wish we could see them again.
Tags: battlestar galactica, lj friends, pimpings, things i don't need to see, tv
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