Polter-Cow (spectralbovine) wrote,
Polter-Cow
spectralbovine

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Those Aren't Rapist Shoes!

Before I get to the Monday night television, I have some fun links for you all! See, we (helpmeveronica.com) developed all these extra bonus videos as a reward for solving the Codemaster's devious puzzles. Of course, only like five people bothered to stick with it long enough, and it seemed like a waste to hide them behind a barrier most people wouldn't make the effort to break through, so now everyone gets them for free. Except for the credits. You actually have to play to see the credits. Just like any other game.

  • A Special Message from Rob Thomas: I got Rob to record a little congratulatory message for the few, the brave, the hearst_helpers. It's worth it for the hilarious face he makes at the end.
  • Who doesn't love a good head-shaving video? That is a rhetorical question. Because everyone loves to watch someone get their head shaved. In this case, that person is jadelynx.
  • Presented by Dr. Von Wolfhausen: alliterator is weird. That's...really all I can say about this one.
  • Veronica Mars meets Clue: That's how it COULD have happened! But how about this? Warning: contains major spoilers for the first two seasons!
  • HMV Gag Reel: Gag reels are always funny. Especially when alliterator randomly inserts a Homestar Runner parody in it. And you can hear me curse!

    We start the night off with Prison Break, which sort of hilariously put into the text discussions I'd been having with people like miniglik. Linc and Michael specifically talk about how Michael is a total control freak, and how what freaks him out is the fact that his plan is getting out of his hands. And Michael straight-up admits how much he needs to be able to control the situation. It was kind of cool to get that shit out in the open. And then Sucre! "I'm not a good guy." I loved that moment! That's what I am loving about this show. We already had Oz, which was deliberately a maximum security prison with, like, the baddest of the bad all trying to kill each other. But Sucre did a little robbery. Tweener stole a fucking baseball card. These guys aren't hardened criminals, but they're on the damn run, and they're being forced into fucked-up situations, and Westmoreland said there's no such thing as an ex-con, and Michael realizes that you can't go home again. I don't know why I'm finding this all so fascinating, but it's tapping into issues of identity, which I love.

    Sarah Wayne Callies is SO VERY PRETTY. It's kind of unreal.

    Also: aaah!! They faked us out! "Oh, they killed the Governor, har har. That's the death for this episode." But then: Tweener! Who was loyal to the end awww.

    And then came Heroes! Which, dude! I mean, I guess it's best just to take them by character, huh?

    Nathan and Peter: Nice scene with the mother, and, having a brother myself, I like seeing brotherly interaction. It was cute when Peter found out he could fly too. Even if the effects were kind of bad.

    Nikki: Holy crap! She is climbing the list of favorite characters now! Now that it's much clearer that she's totally got this freaky-ass split personality that's cutting people in half and cleaning up after her and leaving her special messages and HOW COOL IS THAT? And how freaked-out would you be if one second you were looking at your video camera and then the next you were holding a cell phone. In a random parking lot. Wearing different clothes. I have to interpret the mirror!Nikki as a psychological manifestation because mutant genes really don't cover that sort of thing.

    Claire: Are they going to kill Claire every week? Because that could either get really funny or really old. I had trouble believing that some high school football player could knock into her with enough force to twist her head around. Is she elastic too? The sad thing about Claire is that although she's invulnerable, she doesn't have superhuman strength! How lame is that?

    I love her response to why she needs to find her birth parents. "...what they can do...Like hobbies and skills." HA. And oh my God, I thought they were going to drag out the thing with her EVIL DAD, but he already knows. Oh, this is delicious. And creepy.

    Isaac: Dude needs to get out of his frickin' trance because he's obviously integrally important to the fate of humanity.

    Mohinder: Poor Indian dude with no superpowers. Why does the Indian guy have to be normal, huh?? I will admit that it made me irrationally happy that the show has an important Indian character who's not a stereotype. And he gets to deliver the voiceovers that everyone hates!

    The exterminator scene was well done because I totally believed him at first, and then there were just these looks that went between the two of them, and the whole atmosphere changed. It was cool.

    I like the new Love Interest/Source of Important Plot Information. She's cute. Hell, she sort of looks like Tweener's girlfriend.

    I try to look past the fact that the whole "genome" stuff doesn't make any sense. Just look at the pretty computer screen with its fancy numbers that apparently pinpoint new genetic mutations because apparently everyone's genetic code gets magically uploaded to the Internet or something!

    But, dude. That answering machine message was freaky. With Sylar, the MUTANT SERIAL KILLER OF DOOOOOOOM. Which leads us to:

    Whatever the hell Greg Grunberg's character's name is: Clea Duvall! Bonus! And random telepathy, which is always a good time. And people being stuck to the wall with forks. And heads being lopped off. I was surprised how fucking gruesome they were allowed to be. I didn't know you could show that shit on network TV.

    Hiro: Okay, so I saw the comic book thing in the promos and thought it was cool, and, once again, I was surprised that they actually explained it so quickly. And of course it's Isaac, because he paints the future! Okay, I was sort of hoping the comic book thing was going to be more awesome, like God was writing comics or something, especially because Isaac doesn't seem like the sort of guy who would be slumming in the comic book world. But, see, this is how Hiro's story works in this episode.

    Holy crap, they killed off Isaac already? But...I thought he was going to be important! Like, he had to paint the future for everyone and stuff. And his head is sliced open, fuuuuuck. Oh my God, that means it was Sylar! Wait, what is this guy talking about five weeks? WHY ARE YOU LYING TO THE COPS, YOU ASSHOLE? WHY IS THERE A MISSING POSTER? IS THIS SOME SORT OF OFFICE JOKE? And then, wait, what, it's November 8, huh, and Nathan totally wins the election, and hold on, fuck, OH MY FUCKING GOD IT'S THE FUCKING APOCALYPSE HIRO GET OUT OF THERE AND HOLY GOD HE WENT FIVE WEEKS INTO THE FUTURE.

    And now I am sort of flailing at the awesomeness. Because these bitches gave us five weeks to stop the goddamn apocalypse. With a timespan that short, they won't get away with dragging this out for years. They're going to have to start working on that shit now. I don't know what the hell people were talking about saying everything progressed sloooooooowly because it seemed to me like an awful lot of major plot developments popped up much earlier than I'd expected them to. This show is hella cool.

    Studio 60, on the other hand, is not hella cool. Why is it so boring?

    miniglik: *snooze* *lecture viewing audience* *snooze* *plan skit that's not very funny* *snooze* *ha! funny line of dialogue!* *snooze*

    That sort of sums up the first half of the episode nicely, although it got better in the second half. I've begun warming up to some of the other characters. I'm liking Danny more, and for some reason, Sarah Paulson looked really pretty tonight, and I suddenly found her character more interesting and entertaining. Because I'm shallow. Cal is still pretty awesome.

    I know I asked to see more of the actual show. And, um, oops? Because the actual show isn't all that funny. Sitting through the whole "Science, Schmience!" rehearsal was sort of painful. The montage of the actual airing was a little more successful because we only saw snippets of the show and just heard the audience clapping and loving it, which was at least a better way of telling us the show is brilliantly funny.

    The ACTUAL show, though, is very funny sometimes! Which annoys me, because I'd rather just give up on the show entirely. I'm clearly not seeing what everyone else is seeing. It's not grabbing me, yet it's giving everyone else blow jobs. Maybe I'm just not used to Sorkin's style of drama. It's not that it's bad, and that's the problem. There's all this good stuff mixed in with the boring. I like seeing some of the behind-the-scenes details, the ins and outs of running the show. I guess I'll stick with it, but it's certainly not entertaining me on Monday nights as much as Prison Break and Heroes are.
  • Tags: being indian, helpmeveronica.com, heroes, lj friends, oz, pimpings, prison break, rob thomas, studio 60 on the sunset strip, tv, veronica mars
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