August 12th, 2009

Snap snap joke joke

Give Us This Day Our Daily Grind

I work in drug safety. We monitor the safety of patients on clinical trials. The sites report adverse events to us. Adverse events range from headache to multi-organ failure. One common adverse event is neutropenia, which is the condition of having low neutrophils.

Today, we got a report of...neutrophils. Not low neutrophils or high neutrophils, just...neutrophils. This is like saying, "Man, she's got a bad case of red blood cells."

My co-worker sent an e-mail:
Neutrophils….

…organizing and collaborating? …uniting and dividing?...powers activate?
I responded thusly:
Neutrophils: A new sitcom premiering this fall on Fox!

Jim and Sammy are just your regular twentysomething guys: except they’re white blood cells! Being part of Zac Efron’s immune system is no picnic, and Jim and Sammy are always having wacky adventures as they travel through the bloodstream. But will they score with the hot platelets next door? Tune in to find out!
Capitulation thinks I should write funny things and be published.