hobviously: OMG COW
spectralbovine: I KNOW.
spectralbovine: SURPRISE, MUTHAFUCKA.
hobviously: THEY HAVE TO REACH AN ACCORD
hobviously: OTHERWISE LIFE IS SAD
spectralbovine: LIKE A HONDA?
spectralbovine: HOW THE FUCK IS HE GOING TO EXPLAIN THE BULLET IN HIS LEG???
hobviously: HOW IS... ANYTHING???
spectralbovine: I KNOW.
spectralbovine: HE CAN'T KILL DOAKES.
spectralbovine: BUT HE CAN'T NOT KILL DOAKES.
hobviously: DITTO LILA
spectralbovine: LILA IS WEIRD BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T ACTUALLY KNOW.
spectralbovine: SHE'S JUST...TROUBLE, IN GENERAL.
hobviously: OH SHOW
hobviously: ILU THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS MUCH
spectralbovine: I AM SO GLAD DEXTER IS BACK TO HIMSELF TOO.
spectralbovine: CODE OF HARRY FTW?
Everyone was blah blah calling that Doakes was going to be framed as the Bay Harbor Butcher, and GOOD CALL GUYS I GUESS, but I don't think anyone expected it go down quite like this, which is why this show rocks. Even when the inevitable happens, like Doakes finally discovering definitively that Dexter's a killer, it's still surprising and tense as shit. I didn't even say "Fuck" a million times; I was just completely enthralled and tense and waiting to see how it would go down. I sat up.
But even before all that, holy Jesus fuck was I scared for Dexter. I completely fell for the fake-out, even though I couldn't see where the hell they would go with Dexter actually being caught, like, by the fucking F.B.I. But they were tailing him! And Lundy was all YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW to Deb! And Jesus motherfucking Christ, I was so glad Dexter didn't accidentally give himself away when confronted with the slides because he truly did believe they knew, and it would have been SO EASY to accidentally incriminate himself even though by that time I had realized that they had called him in because of the blood.
ALSO SERIOUSLY THEY FIND BLOOD SLIDES AS TROPHIES AND THEY DON'T SUSPECT THE FUCKING BLOOD GUY??
And Lila! Causing trouble! Stay away from Angel!! God, I actually liked her in the beginning when everyone else just seemed to hate her on principle, but as of the moment we learned that she was shitballs crazy and manipulative, I've haaaaaaaaaaated her, and if she fucks over Angel, well, that's all the more reason to hate her. I don't care if she's hot and has an accent! I can look past that! I...honestly kind of detest her. It's probably a testament to how much I love and am protective of Dexter that I loathe her so much now. (Besides, she made Dexter close to unlikable for a while, and you just don't do that.)
So what the hell happens now?? I was so afraid Dexter had accidentally killed Doakes in the water, and now he's locked him in a cage, and...how are they going to team up and bond over their shared love of vigilante justice? How the hell is this season going to end? What the crap is going to happen next season? How did they manage to give every single character some interesting developments over the course of the season, even Masuka?
OH SHOW. YOU DO EVERYTHING BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE.
I love this show so hard.
I'm really glad the promos weren't indicative of the episode, because those were some misleading-ass promos, as they appeared to take EVERY SINGLE BRYCE SCENE OUT OF CONTEXT, making it look like he was some crazy psycho out to get Chuck, which MADE NO SENSE. But, whew, he's still a good friend, and...he wasn't even rogue?! The Fulcrum shit is kind of weird and crazy, but I will go with it, Son of Alias!
I say this as a heterosexual male: Bryce Larkin is really hot.
This show is educational!
I really love how fucking clever the writing on this show is, how they hide setups to important plot points in earlier jokes. The amusing Klingon test comes in handy at the end, and the terribly amusing Pineapple Situation conversation suddenly becomes awesome when Chuck saves everyone's ass with NOT MORE THAN ONE WORD.
And the ending! I don't care how on-the-nose it is, having to choose which phone to answer even with the song on the soundtrack saying that Chuck will love you more than he does or whatever. CHOOSE CHUCK, SARAH!!
OH SHOW. I AM SO HAPPY YOU HAVE BEEN PICKED UP FOR A FULL SEASON.
Wait wait wait. So Noah didn't die? Then why the glazed-eye effect? Oh, whatever. It's better this way anyway. Bringing people back from the dead opens too many doors.
Oh, MOHINDER. You fucking idiot. Has it ever occurred to you that Bennet's paranoia is REAL? Like, has the dude ever been wrong about the Company? HE ONLY FUCKING WORKED THERE FOR YEARS. And I swear to God, if Mohinder's quest to destroy the viruses ends up releasing 138, I...will punch that motherfucker in the face. AND THEN DIE ALONG WITH 93% OF THE HUMAN POPULATION.
I really like Niki when she's Micah. They're adorable together. She missed him every nanosecond!! Awww.
I don't fucking understand Maya at all. What the hell did Sylar do? Tell her to try to stop it? OH. THAT'S WHY IT DIDN'T WORK BEFORE? SHE JUST WASN'T TRYING HARD ENOUGH?! Also, is she COMPLETELY BRAINDEAD not to notice Sylar's tone on the phone to Mohinder? Like, is she completely immune to subtext? Why is she standing there SMILING LIKE A SCHOOLGIRL? Also, if this virus is going to kill everyone anyway, WHAT IS HER PURPOSE? Sylar isn't even feasting on brains these days, and, seriously, if her ONLY PURPOSE is to give Sylar her power...did we seriously have to watch their entire storyline?
Oh, also, Peter! This is just getting pathetic. You seriously won't listen to Mr. "Save the Cheerleader, Save the World"? (Side note: Ando said EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING when Hiro left!! "Why is saving the world always your responsibility?" Ahahahaha.) ALSO. I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND TEMPORAL MECHANICS. JESUS CHRIST. IF YOU DESTROY THE VIRUS, CAITLIN FUCKING CEASES TO EXIST, YOU FOOL, AS THAT FUTURE WILL DISAPPEAR.
Elle and Bob are like this dark, twisted version of Veronica and Keith! Also, I completely feel her pain having to deal with a stupid sling! And she's got it on her good arm!
Let's hope for some crazy awesome payoffs next week!
OH SHOW. YOU ALWAYS SPOIL TOO FUCKING MUCH IN YOUR GODDAMN PROMOS.