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Another Thing About the Indian People: They Love Sex Positions - The Book of the Celestial Cow

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December 12th, 2006


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07:28 pm - Another Thing About the Indian People: They Love Sex Positions
So, most of you know I don't read fanfic, as a rule. I've been known to make some exceptions, but I am not a fanfic person.

YET, I am here to promote a supercool ficathon!

THE NON-ANGLO/WESTERN/MAINSTREAM HOLIDAY MULTIFANDOM FIC CHALLENGE-ARAMA-THON-FEST!!!

hobviously believes all non-Christmas holidays are underrepresented in fanfic, and she wants all of you ficcers to go wild and represent, what what. Her post has more details, but I think it's a great idea. Fanfic is so widely read that writing about underrepresented holidays is a way to educate people about other cultures! Is this not a moral imperative? Get in the non-mainstream holiday spirit!

And just to make this post not totally all about not me, check out the new cell phone I just ordered. DRAGON PHONE. I do believe that this does, in fact, make me cooler than all of you. COMBINED.

I salute you, Chad of T-Mobile.

In conclusion, here is my summary of the Ramayana:
Once there was Rama, and he was a pimp! Then some megapimp bee-yotch named Ravana stole his ho, Sita, and took her into the jungle. So Rama went out and bitchslapped that bitch so he could bring his bitch back home. And then Rama got all mad that some megapimp bee-yotch had been all up in his bitch, so he banished her back to the jungle, where she had two pimp twins. Finally, Rama thought the gods might kick his ass for being a little bitch, so he went into the jungle, and everyone lived happily ever after, yo!

Current Mood: coldcool
Current Music: Regina Spektor - On the Radio

(27 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:truemyth
Date:December 13th, 2006 03:40 am (UTC)
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The multitude of bitches confuzzles me.
[User Picture]
From:sterope
Date:December 13th, 2006 03:44 am (UTC)
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Hahaha! I had to read the Ramayana for a class. It was the only book I actually finished for that class, actually. I enjoy the excessive amount of bitches.
[User Picture]
From:vaspider
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:02 am (UTC)
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And how much did you pay for that swank, swank cellphone? :D
[User Picture]
From:spectralbovine
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:22 am (UTC)
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Why, a mere thirty dollars! Although the shipping/tax costs almost added up to the fifty dollars I would have paid in the store, which I don't think had the DRAGON PHONE, though. Not that I saw.
[User Picture]
From:vaspider
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:25 am (UTC)
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They should have. o.O We have the DRAGON PHONE. Well. We did. We sold out tonight. And they should have it for $30, too. I swear, the people at the store you went to didn't know what the hell they were doing.
[User Picture]
From:spectralbovine
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:40 am (UTC)
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I would agree. At least the girl who helped me didn't seem to know much (she was baffled when I asked her how much talk time the phone had because no one had ever asked her that before). The other guy there seemed more knowledgeable. And also their computers had inexplicably gone down before I got there so they had trouble logging on to check my account until the guy (who knew what he was doing) got it to work again. And she was all, "You can't use myFaves on this phone, though," and I said, "Uh, it says right there on the tag that it's myFaves-compatible." God! Stupid girl.
[User Picture]
From:vaspider
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:47 am (UTC)
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*blink blink* five hours, or about three if you're using a bluetooth headset with it. How do you not know this stuff? Bweh!

God, now I'm embarrassed. I hope she was really, really new.

(And our computers die on us distressingly often. CAM is a little bitch.)
[User Picture]
From:upanashad
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:04 am (UTC)
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Hey, who you calling a ho?

I can't decide if your dragon phone is very classy or more gangsta-chic, like it would go well with a wifebeater and lots of chains.
[User Picture]
From:toughcookie42
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:17 am (UTC)
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Oh, it's gangsta-chic. But be sure to wear the silver chains, not the gold ones. Pimp gotta match.
[User Picture]
From:vaspider
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:18 am (UTC)
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Well, it was designed by Ami James of Miami Ink. Does that make a difference?
[User Picture]
From:upanashad
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:21 am (UTC)
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Does that make a difference?

Oh God, yes. Gangsta-chic it is.
[User Picture]
From:spectralbovine
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:22 am (UTC)
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Dragon Tribe!
[User Picture]
From:vaspider
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:41 am (UTC)
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Oh the things that don't come across in text. Like 'deadpan tone of voice,' for example.
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From:amberlynne
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:51 am (UTC)
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My friend Adrienne would cut you for that cell phone. She loves her some Ami. I even got her a Miami Ink book for Christmas. Watch out for the MI fan girls, that's all I'm sayin'.
From:hobviously
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:52 am (UTC)
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Why is your phone so rad and my phone so not?

Now I need another ficathon to cheer me up. :(((((((((
[User Picture]
From:spectralbovine
Date:December 13th, 2006 07:58 am (UTC)
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Really awesome cell phone ficathon?

Veronica/Sidekick OTP?!
[User Picture]
From:incidentist
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:53 am (UTC)
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I wanna send your summary to the Feminist Interpretation of Ramayana chicks.

Your phone doesn't make you cooler than me, but I do believe it qualifies you to hang out with me and my Magritte PowerBook.
[User Picture]
From:soundingsea
Date:December 13th, 2006 02:46 pm (UTC)
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That fic challenge sounds really fun. I'd love to write about Eid, which according to one of my ESL students is the best holiday ever because it mandates new clothes! It's the Shopping Holiday! :)
(Deleted comment)
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From:harper47
Date:December 13th, 2006 04:53 pm (UTC)
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I love your phone. That is seriously awesome.

Hee on your summary. See - now I have no reason to read this.
[User Picture]
From:spectralbovine
Date:December 13th, 2006 05:07 pm (UTC)
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Well, it's not entirely accurate! You should read it if you're interested. Or at least the Wikipedia summary, which will be closer to the story. Heh.
[User Picture]
From:harper47
Date:December 13th, 2006 05:18 pm (UTC)
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Oh I got that. But seriously - I'm thinking this could be a blurb. They could put it on posters, book covers, etc.

(Not mad at me? Did you read my long, splainy why I posted to zimshan post in my lj? When I saw your comments, I was all - frak now PC's mad at me. Not that you posted anything at all to indicate you were mad, I was just practicing my I'm now telepathic and predicting that PC will be mad at me mode. And yes - today I am 12. Hee!)
[User Picture]
From:spectralbovine
Date:December 13th, 2006 05:24 pm (UTC)
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But seriously - I'm thinking this could be a blurb. They could put it on posters, book covers, etc.
Hee. It would get all the kids readin'!

And, no, I'm not mad at you! I'm going to respond to your post when I read it instead of continuing in zimshan's journal.
[User Picture]
From:shpyum
Date:December 13th, 2006 06:01 pm (UTC)
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I watch a lot of Miami Ink, and sort of hate Ami on principle, but that phone is so goddamned awesome.

That. . .has nothing to do with anything.
[User Picture]
From:unseenlibrarian
Date:December 13th, 2006 06:46 pm (UTC)
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Your summary of the Ramayana leads me to point you to the Sitayana:
http://clusterfunction.com/video/ninapaleydotcom/Sitayana/

Yes. It's a musical retelling of the Ramayana from Sita's point of view. Probably best not to ask why.
[User Picture]
From:spectralbovine
Date:December 13th, 2006 06:55 pm (UTC)
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Haaaaaaaaa. Oh man, that looks great. Thanks, I ought to watch that when I have the time.
From:(Anonymous)
Date:January 26th, 2007 07:37 pm (UTC)

more positions

(Link)
Indians are a good people,in touch with their sexuality. this blog is also filled with sexual advice,you should check it out!
http://bestsexguide.blogspot.com/

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