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August 31st, 2016


10:24 pm - The Straight Stories
Far less genre this time!

Straight Outta Compton: B+/A-Collapse )

About Time: B/B+Collapse )

My Neighbor Totoro: B+Collapse )

Girlfight: B+/A-Collapse )

The Purge: B+Collapse )

The Purge: Anarchy: B+Collapse )

The Last Five Years: B+Collapse )

Kiki"s Delivery Service: A-Collapse )

Pitch Perfect 2: B/B+Collapse )

Cape Fear: B+/A-Collapse )

The Hateful Eight: B/B+Collapse )

Jackie Brown: B+Collapse )

Prisoners: BCollapse )

The Lobster: B/B+Collapse )

Up next: who knows, who cares, who's even reading.
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: Headlights - Your Old Street

(4 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

June 7th, 2016


09:04 am - Star Trek: Voyager? More Like Bar Dreck: Dowager!
For some reason Star Trek: Voyager does not have the same fandom popularity as Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. Could it possibly be because it has the first female captain? Or that has a large focus on female characters? Or that it has the most diverse cast? WHO KNOWS, because it's certainly not because it sucks. In fact—and I know my opinion is biased by having seen a very abridged version—it nicely combines the excellent standalones of TNG with the serialization and character work of DS9. The best of both worlds, if you will (and that is a very pointed reference, given how central the Borg are to the series).

Voyager has a deceptively simple (if somewhat ludicrous) premise: the starship Voyager gets transported seventy-five million light years away and ends up stranded in the Delta Quadrant. So now they have to get back to the Alpha Quadrant, by hook or by crook! M-mostly by hook because Janeway is no crook (that is a recurring theme). On top of the general How Do We Get Home? is another cool idea baked into the setup: the crew of the lost Voyager includes both members of Starfleet and members of the Maquis (and many of these terrorists are former Starfleet). How are they all supposed to work together...and what are the chances of a mutiny?

Captain Kathryn Janeway (aka Space Mom) loves two things above all: coffee and Starfleet principles. The two things that are going to get her through this ordeal. Time and again, we see Janeway turn to the Federation charter for guidance, some way to know how to act in lawless space and still maintain her humanity, and it's an admirable quality, despite the pressures it puts on her and her crew. There's the easy way and there's the Janeway. Chakotay (aka Space Dad) often offers the Maquis perspective, the "whatever, Starfleet RULES" perspective, but he also has to keep Janeway in check when her adherence to a strict moral code (or potential deviation from it) may put the ship at risk. I can't think of many other positively portrayed Native American characters in science fiction, and even though his may not be the most accurate representation, he's a great character. Harry Kim is quite adorable, a precious cinnamon roll who wants to get home and see his family, but the show doesn't give him a whole lot to do most of the time. Tom Paris starts out as Entitled White Guy, a pilot with a chip on his shoulder, but he eventually reveals an endearingly nerdy side; I was not very fond of him for a while but I grew to like him. B'Elanna Torres is half-Klingon but the opposite of Worf: she hates everything Klingon and has no desire to connect with that side of her. She's also a brilliant engineer, and she gets to geek out with science nerd Janeway a lot. I love B'Elanna a lot and was surprised she doesn't come up in discussions of awesome Star Trek women! Tuvok is a black Vulcan with a history with Janeway, and he is...very Vulcan! Like, even more Vulcan than Spock, much more stern without as much lightness to him, but that just makes me love him more somehow. The Doctor is a self-aware hologram who becomes one of the best characters on the show, thanks to both Robert Picardo's entertaining performance and all the different ways the show makes use of him as a hologram. Neelix is a Talaxian who is responsible for crew morale and food; he's a bit irritating at first but once he settles down he's a good guy. Kes is an Ocampan with a sexy-as-hell voice and...a poorly written character. Finally, though she doesn't join the show until later, Seven of Nine is one of the best written and best acted characters, a former Borg drone torn between her Borgness and her developing humanity; she is my Spock, my Worf, my Odo. Jeri Ryan's performance is wonderful, and the character is fascinating, and her sometimes-contentious relationship with Janeway is compelling, and it's a real shame she often gets dismissed as a sexy fanservice thanks to her skintight costume.

Although TNG has the more iconic characters thanks to their place in history, I think Voyager has much better developed characters who actually grow and change in noticeable ways throughout the series (TNG, of course, was more of a reset-to-the-status-quo kind of show). While its plot arcs aren't as complex as DS9's, I loved that there were times when I would watch an episode that had a huge plot twist that had been set up over the course of several episodes but I still felt the impact because the episode itself slyly provided all the necessary information to experience the twist. Voyager is rather skillful at crafting episodes, especially ones that open with a WTF scenario that is then explained as an alternate future or a daydream or a hologram (this show really knows how to use the holodeck). I also loved at how well it tied character development into the crisis of the week (especially with regards to Seven of Nine); I know I watched the best episodes but goddamn there is some fine writing in this show and it deserves to have a better reputation.

I enjoyed Voyager so much that I wasn't even halfway through my very abridged list before I realized that I would want to watch more, that 40ish episodes was not enough. I am glad I got the compressed experience of this crew's journey, but I want to have more adventures with them!
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Panic! at the Disco - Don't Threaten Me with a Good Time

(7 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

May 24th, 2016


10:50 am - Where No Cow Has Been Lost in Space Before
My Star Trek experience was supposed to end with Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, but my friend Olivia was so insistent that I watch Star Trek: Voyager—and some other friends were fans as well—that I decided that while I did not have the time to dedicate a true abridged watch, I was interested in getting a taste of the show to see what the deal was, so I asked her to curate a Greatest Hits version, distilling the whole show into, like, 30 episodes. Which became more like 40 episodes, thanks to various two-parters. She used the Bechdel test as a criterion for inclusion, which helped narrow the list down; when Bryan Fuller got the new Star Trek gig, I also asked for some good Fuller episodes. Voyager has a plot arc so some episodes are essential, but it's not as heavily serialized as DS9, so it was a matter of choosing enough episodes for me to be able to follow the general plot while also giving me some of the best standalones the series has to offer.

For reference, here is the list! I am more than halfway through it and I'm really enjoying the show!

Coffee! I think that"s Janeway"s catchphrase.Collapse )

A WHOLE NEW SET OF SPACESHIP BABIES.
Current Mood: stressedstressed
Current Music: Babymetal - Karate

(5 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

May 5th, 2016


04:34 pm - Star Trek: Deep Space Nine? More Like Bar Dreck: Sleep Mace Line!
Remember when I said that for many people Star Trek: The Next Generation is the definitive Trek? Well, for many other people, it's Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, a show I had been wanting to watch for years ever since I learned it was essentially Ron Moore's training ground for Battlestar Galactica. And hot damn, was it ever fun to spot all the connections between the two shows!

This show is, in many ways, the anti-Trek: it takes place on a space station! They're not even trekking! They are chilling out next to a friggin' wormhole with aliens who have incredible powers and no sense of linear time and a planet with people who worship said aliens, believing them to be their Prophets. That planet is none other than Bajor, first introduced in TNG, now free from the Cardassian Occupation (the first few seasons of DS9 run concurrently with the last few seasons of TNG, so I did come into the show with one spoiler for a plot point that was supposed to be initially introduced on this show). DS9 brings over the Bajorans, the Cardassians, the Ferengi, even the Trill—all alien races from TNG characterized by the classic Trek motto "One Race, One Character Trait"—along with old favorites like the Klingons and Romulans...and deepens them all as it examines what it is actually like for the Federation to share space with these other aliens. The DS9 motto seems to be "Thanks for all these toys, TNG, now we're going to break them!"

Deep Space Nine, unlike the Enterprise, feels like a real place where people other than the main characters live, people who can be affected by the consequences of Our Heroes' actions. We see so many different areas of the space station rather than spending most of our time on the bridge. And who are Our Heroes? Benjamin Sisko, who's almost as unlike Picard as Picard is unlike Kirk. He's proud, fierce, and righteous, but he's a bit more flexible morally and ethically: he's a realist, not an idealist. And he's a father! His son, Jake, grows up over the course of the series, and Sisko's relationship with Jake is one of the show's strong points; it's far better than the one between Beverly Crusher and Wesley Crusher, which...barely existed. Kira Nerys, a former Bajoran freedom fighter (or terrorist, depending on who you ask) who serves as the liaison between Starfleet and Bajor (this character was supposed to be Ensign Ro, and in the early episodes, I imagined a show with Ro, but Kira becomes a wonderful character of her own, with a troubled past and also some flexible morals). Jadzia Dax, a female Trill science officer who knew Sisko when she was the male Kurzon Dax, whom Sisko affectionately referred to as "Old Man." I love the relationship between Sisko and Dax a lot because they have so much more history than anyone else on the station. Julian Bashir, charming genius medical officer with the utmost concern for his patients, whoever (or whatever) they may be. Miles O'Brien, Everyman engineer with a wife and kid. Odo, shapeshifting security chief with a mysterious past. Quark, Ferengi bar owner with the utmost respect for the ways of Ferenginar. I mean. Just look at that fucking character list. Realize I haven't even mentioned awesome supporting characters like Quark's brother and nephew, Rom and Nog, and Garak, the only Cardassian on DS9, a plain and simple tailor. AND DON'T FORGET PERPETUAL BARFLY MORN. Put all these incredibly different characters on a goddamn space station and just watch what happens.

As with previous Treks, I watched an abridged version, but this was the least abridged of the three series, as I ended up watching more than 75% of the episodes. The biggest cuts were in the first season, understandably, as the show was still figuring itself out, but once it started introducing serialized storylines, it really took off. I wasn't sure how the storytelling would work in a static environment, but they made it work. Since they weren't on a starship that could go out and find trouble, trouble often came to them! And they could also take smaller ships out exploring (often through that friggin' wormhole) and discover a whole host of trouble. I don't even want to say anything about the host of stories because they came as a surprise to me, but as a rule some of the most successful stories involved the Cardassians—who are trying to deal with losing control of Bajor just as the Bajorans are trying to deal with interacting with their former oppressors in any civil way—and some of the least successful stories involved the Prophets—who basically make no sense and speak in riddles and can do anything the plot requires them to. That being said, this is the best depiction of religion I've seen in science fiction since...well...Battlestar Galactica. It is a show that respects that people have beliefs, and that their beliefs are important to them, even if others don't believe the same thing.

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine is an amazing show that was ahead of its time. This is what we want from our television today, and it was doing it in the nineties. A diverse ensemble cast, with characters getting spotlight episodes, even ones not in the main cast. Long-term arcs full of surprises and emotional payoffs. A charismatic villain who has one of the best character arcs in the series. Complexity and moral greyness up the wazoo. This is top-notch science fiction right here.

(6 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

March 28th, 2016


11:46 am - From Halloween to Easter
A lot of science fiction and horror this time around!

Hellraiser: B/B+Collapse )

Exam: B+Collapse )

Talvar: B+Collapse )

Star Trek: Generations: B-Collapse )

As Above, So Below: BCollapse )

Star Trek: First Contact: B+/A-Collapse )

The Final Girls: B+/A-Collapse )

Rocky: B+/A-Collapse )

Spy: A-Collapse )

Inside Llewyn Davis: B+Collapse )

What We Do in the Shadows: A-Collapse )

Meet the Patels: A-Collapse )

Trainwreck: B-/BCollapse )

Advantageous: B/B+Collapse )

Tomorrowland: B/B+Collapse )

The Big Short: B+/A-Collapse )

Overall, a very strong batch, with some notable clunkers! That's the way it goes sometimes.

(2 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

December 21st, 2015


11:26 am - Where No Cow Has Remained in One Place Before
I loved Star Trek The Next Generation, and I always had my eyes set on watching Star Trek Deep Space Nine afterward! But, uh, abridged, of course. I used this list of essential episodes as a starting point and let my friends flesh it out.

In the end, my "abridged" DS9 is about 75% of the series, as opposed to about 50% of the series for TNG. Which sounds about right!

For reference, here is my list! As before, I don't need you to tell me I have to watch every single episode or complain that your favorite episode is left out. They will all still be there when I'm done for bonus space station babies. (They're not my space station babies yet. But they will be!)

Engage! Wait, no, that was Picard, I don"t know if Sisko has a catchphrase.Collapse )

Get excited with me, everyone! I'm going to watch DS9!!
Current Mood: busybusy
Current Music: Veruca Salt - Shutterbug

(3 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

December 10th, 2015


08:37 am - Steven Universe? More Like Gem and the Stevengrams!
For the longest time, I thought of Steven Universe as "that annoying show that took over the Adventure Time AV Club comments." I had no idea what it was about, but I was irritated by it on principle. Then, out of nowhere, it became the show du jour among my people! Twitter would not shut up about this goddamn Steven Universe show! THIS CARTOON FOR CHILDREN wait people were right about Adventure Time though.

Steven Universe begins harmlessly enough. There's a loud, boisterous boy named Steven, and he's...he's a Crystal Gem? He's got a gem stuck in his belly. And it's supposed to give him special powers. That appear to be activated by his favorite ice cream, Cookie Cat. Uh, okay. And he lives with three other Crystal Gems, whatever those are. Pearl, tall and skinny and lithe like a dancer, very prim, very meticulous. Amethyst, short and squat and buff like a fighter, very crass, very feral. Garnet, tall and built and calm like a Zen master, very soft-spoken, very enigmatic. And they all have magical powers or whatever. Okay, that was a decent eleven minutes of story, but what's the big deal?

Oh. You guys. This show is a big fucking deal.

The absolute genius of Steven Universe lies in how the show slowly reveals itself to be so much more than you thought it was, and on top of that, so forward-thinking that it's clear that they knew all of these incredible worldbuilding and character details from the beginning. This is a show that will focus on a cheeseburger backpack and a stack of waffles but actually tell you all about the world and backstory if you pay attention to the setting and the dialogue. This is a show that can introduce a character and then make me cry about her in seven minutes. This is a show that will drop earthshattering worldbuilding into episodes when you least expect it. The S1 finale contains a moment that is one of the most brilliant things I have ever seen done in any medium, a culmination of tremendous character and storytelling work.

My challenge here is, as it always is, to attempt to sell the show without spoiling it, especially since I came in knowing nothing so even basic worldbuilding things like "What the hell is a Crystal Gem?" were unknown to me, and I enjoyed learning every new piece of information as the show told it to me since I was learning it along with Steven. Steven learns more and more about what the Gems are, who they were, where they came from, what they are here for, and what they do, as he attempts to fulfill his own destiny as a Gem and aid them on missions. Often...poorly, since he can't seem to activate his own powers, and also he's Steven, and he's a doof. A lovable fucking doof. (This line tells you everything you need to know about Steven: "We can totally build a spaceship! People have done it before, and we're people!") But they're going to keep Beach City safe. And also weird. KEEP BEACH CITY WEIRD.

Beach City is very weird, you guys. Here are the titles of some episodes from which you may be able to glean weirdness: "Cat Fingers," "Tiger Millionaire," "Steven's Lion," some other feline stuff, "Watermelon Steven," okay, that's enough. I came to the show expecting something like Adventure Time, but they are very, very different shows, the only commonalities being an excitable boy and a surprising amount of worldbuilding and emotional destruction. Steven Universe is far more coherent and interested in telling character-focused stories, whereas Adventure Time often seems to just delight in weirdness for weirdness's sake. And I love Steven Universe far, far more than I love Adventure Time now (I still like Adventure Time though). But my point is that the show has delightfully bizarre standalone episodes that highlight the town's inhabitants, like Sadie and Lars, who work at Steven's favorite donut shop; conspiracy theorist Ronaldo, who has a very important blog; Mayor Dewey, who, like most fictional politicians (and, uh, real ones, I guess), is terrible and incompetent; Onion, who...who...I don't even know about Onion, you guys, but I love that weird little dude; the Pizzas, who run a pizza shop. And so on. The show has more diversity onscreen and offscreen than most shows, too! In addition to Garnet and the Pizzas, Steven's best friend, Connie, is Indian, and nearly all the voice actors are women of color.

Besides the consistently amazing writing and ever-more-complex characters (every single character has hidden depths, is far more interesting than you think they are initially), I love how fucking positive this show is. It promotes love, but not in a cheesy THE POWER OF LOVE way, but in the real way that people care for and about each other. Steven and the Gems have conflicts, but they resolve them by talking about them and understanding that they are not perfect. Steven fucks up a lot, but the Gems are his family, and they always forgive him: they know he means well and they know that making him feel bad won't solve anything. There are some episodes in the second season that I could not believe, because I'd never seen conversations like this on television, and this was on a show for children, not sugarcoating the world for kids, allowing them to see that the world is messy but still beautiful, that relationships are hard but they are worth it.

Steven Universe starts out a weird children's show and then proves itself to be legitimately good science fiction with a more nuanced and mature depiction of friendship, romance, and relationships between women than most live-action dramas. It is an amazing fucking goddamn show, and more people need to be watching it.
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Hamilton - Yorktown (The World Turned Upside Down)

(9 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

October 21st, 2015


01:43 pm - Raymond Cinematic
Science fiction! Drama! Comedy! You will find them all here. Like you did last time.

Dear White People: B+/A-Collapse )

Selma: B+/A-Collapse )

Kamikaze Girls: B+/A-Collapse )

Focus: B+Collapse )

The DUFF: B+Collapse )

Jupiter Ascending: B/B+Collapse )

Chappie: B/B+Collapse )

Home: C+Collapse )

RoboCop: B+/A-Collapse )

About a Boy: B+/A-Collapse )

Harold and Maude: B+/A-Collapse )

Caddyshack: B-Collapse )

Broadcast News: B+Collapse )

Lucy: BCollapse )

What will I watch next? Who knows, I AM FICKLE.
Current Mood: hungryhungry
Current Music: VAST - Blue

(5 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

October 10th, 2015


04:05 pm - Star Trek: The Next Generation? More Like Bar Dreck: The Sext Configuration!
For many people, Star Trek: The Next Generation is the definitive Trek, and now I see why: after a rough start, this show got really fucking good! I had an advantage in that I watched an abridged version, allowing me to skip most of the first couple seasons and concentrate on the higher-quality episodes. Like Star Trek: The Original Series, this show follows the Enterprise on its mission to explore space and learn more about the universe and the life within it, but it's a whole new crew! A new generation, if you will. The next one.

I am not really sure how anyone could choose Kirk over Picard in any sort of competition because Picard is simply an amazing human being. He prizes integrity and truth above all else, with loyalty a close second (personal loyalty and honor come before loyalty to the Federation, whose authority he is willing to question if he believes that they are wrong). Patrick Stewart imbues him with natural gravitas, and he is at his best when portraying a broken man, which he gets the opportunity to do multiple times. Riker, his Number One, is eminently likable, even if he's a bit caddish at times; if Picard is the dad, then Riker is the cool big brother. Jonathan Frakes occasionally gets to show his chops when Riker gets meatier stories about his conflicted loyalties, struggling with his personal ambition and his duty to the Enterprise. Data, predictably, was one of my very favorite characters because he's an android who wants to be human! Brent Spiner is fucking fantastic, and the show takes full advantage of his skills by allowing him to play multiple characters and show different sides of Data. Worf, surprisingly, was also one of my very favorite characters because he's a Klingon who has grown up in a human world, and thus he experiences a huge cultural conflict, wanting to stay true to his Klingon roots despite preferring some of the beliefs he's learned from humans. Worf episodes were usually strong because of his ongoing story, and Michael Dorn took what could have been a simple RAWR WARRIOR character and made him someone far more complex. Dr. Crusher is always the smartest human in the room (also the hottest), and I loved how her scientific mind constantly worked to solve problems. Gates McFadden sold her as a strong, independent, intelligent woman with a sharp sense of humor. LaForge also worked problems with science, and I loved his friendship with Data. LeVar Burton rarely got to do more than be amiable and knowledgeable, but he did that well! Troi, uh, sensed really obvious emotions with her mind. Marina Sirtis, uh, did the best with what she had.

The core main cast acquitted themselves well, but the show also had great recurring characters, like John DeLancie's Q, space trickster, and Whoopi Goldberg's Guinan, space bartender. Special credit to Whoopi Goldberg for turning a cryptic advice-giving cipher of a character into one of the most memorable figures in the show, thanks to her warm presence and sense of infinite knowledge, like she was a retired Doctor. And of course familiar faces continually turned up in guest roles (Ashley Judd??).

Over the course of seven seasons, TNG told a lot of different kinds of stories, and I enjoyed most of them. Holodeck episodes were usually a good time, especially when Data played Sherlock Holmes. I loved how both the holodeck and the transporter were basically story phlebotinum, able to malfunction in new and interesting ways when it would make for a cool story. The show dipped into the time travel well quite a bit too, usually to good effect. New alien races provided a source of material as well, and aliens were generally denoted by looking completely human except for, like, a fucked-up brow ridge. Since that's how evolution works! My three favorite episodes were "The Measure of a Man," "Remember Me," and "Darmok," each notable in its own way, but I loved a lot of episodes and admired the storytelling. The show often faltered with two-parters, either setting up more than it could pay off, or stretching a one-episode plot to two, but I still mostly enjoyed those as well (I finally know why it matters that THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS). And endings, boy, does this show know how fuck up endings. Even though it's more serial than the original series, and the various ongoing plotlines and callbacks were awesome, it is at its heart an episodic show, meaning things have to return to the status quo at the end, so there's usually a rushed resolution, and then some meaningful exchange as characters look out into the stars and the episode abruptly ends. Thankfully, the series finale is easily one of the best ever, beautifully tying the series together and giving the characters a proper sendoff.

I am going to miss my spaceship babies, but I skipped half the episodes, so they will always be there, waiting for me! I've gone where no one has gone before (except, uh, most of everyone), and I'm already itching to go back.
Current Mood: anxiousanxious
Current Music: Silversun Pickups - Ragamuffin

(12 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

May 26th, 2015


01:48 am - Science Friction and Rantasy
As a special treat for you guys, this time I've got a few movies I really didn't like! I know, I like everything, what is the deal. I don't like everything, it turns out.

Melancholia: CCollapse )

Another Earth: B+/A-Collapse )

Under the Skin: DCollapse )

Europa Report: B/B+Collapse )

The Guest: B+/A-Collapse )

The Untouchables: B+/A-Collapse )

Why Don"t You Play in Hell?: A-Collapse )

Whiplash: A-Collapse )

Hustle & Flow: B+/A-Collapse )

Foxcatcher: B-/BCollapse )

Ghost in the Shell: B/B+Collapse )

Ghost in the Shell 2: Innocence: BCollapse )

Mad Max: BCollapse )

Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior: B+/A-Collapse )

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome: B/B+Collapse )

The Cell: B/B+Collapse )

My Netflix queue has some recent movies I've missed, but I may be dipping into more older stuff too!
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Kasabian - Butcher Blues

(4 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

February 17th, 2015


11:27 am - Where No Cow Has Gone Before
It took me over a year to watch every episode of Futurama (one of the three of you still reading please comment on that poor lonely entry!), and, well, now that I have been focusing more on writing, I have less time to mainline television shows!

So when I decided to watch Star Trek: The Next Generation, I decided that I would do an abridged version, as I had done for Star Trek: The Original Series. I used Max Temkin's "Star Trek: The Next Generation in 40 Hours" as a starting point and then doubled the list using recommendations from friends. I think I have a pretty good list here, and I've already burned through the first two seasons this way! ALL OF MY FAVORITE EPISODES ARE DATA EPISODES.

For reference, here are the episodes I'm watching, if you would also like to experience TNG without watching a million hours of television. Please do not tell me that I am DOING IT WRONG by not watching every episode or rend your hair because I have left out an episode that you personally believe I should watch. I am happy with my list. The other episodes will still be there when I'm done.

Engage!Collapse )

Would you like to share in my excitement for finally seeing why everyone loves TNG so much? Make it so!

(18 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

January 25th, 2015


05:27 pm - Futurama? More Like Suture Llama!
Over 17 months ago, I decided to start watching all of Futurama, along with Louie (which I gave up after a season). I had watched scattered episodes (including, yes, "Jurassic Bark"), but I hadn't watched every single episode, and I thought that was something worth doing.

Good news, everyone! I was right!

Futurama begins with a ridiculous premise that sets the tone for the entire show: Philip J. Fry, hapless pizza delivery boy, delivers pizza to a cryogenics facility on the last day of the millennium and falls into a cryogenic pod, as you do. He wakes up a thousand years later and begins working for another delivery service, Planet Express. Fry is a dolt in the Homer Simpson mold, and, like Homer Simpson, he becomes implausibly dumb for the sake of a joke. But he's far more endearing, especially thanks to his enduring crush on Leela, the one-eyed captain of the ship, who thinks he's sweet but does not return his affections. Bender is a hard-drinking, violence-loving robot in the Homer Simpson mold, and, like Homer Simpson, he becomes implausibly cruel for the sake of a joke. But he's...not very endearing, really, though he has his occasional moments of sweetness that are quickly forgotten when he once again acts in complete self-interest. Amy Wong is so rich she doesn't understand money and so promiscuous she doesn't understand commitment. Hermes is a Jamaican accountant, the ultimate bureaucrat and limbo master. Professor Farnsworth gives the orders and performs all manner of mad science.

It is hilariously appropriate that I forgot Zoidberg, the crustacean alien doctor whom everyone hates except the audience because he is wonderful. His always pathetically sincere "Hooray!" has become my definitive conception of the exclamation.

Character development is not necessarily a concern for the show; pretty much everyone is fundamentally the same at the end as they were at the beginning, even though they've gone through a lot. Fry and Leela's relationship ebbs and flows, and Amy finds love for a while, but I think we get far more character development in backstory than we do in the present storylines, and those are quite fun! Since everyone's character traits and quirks are highly exaggerated, I enjoyed watching the writers attempt to justify them and give them real resonance.

While Futurama holds very little regard for the laws of physics, reality, and even general logic at times, there's no question it's a smartly written show, full to the brim with math and science in-jokes and veritably overflowing with puns ranging from groanworthy to incredibly clever. I was impressed with how many variations on characters' catchphrases they could come up with; who knew "Good news, everyone!" could be so versatile? Who knew there were so many different reasons Hermes could cry, "My manwich!"? How many things could Bender say are 40% something? Not to mention the many, many variations on "Bite my shiny metal ass." Although there isn't a huge amount of continuity, it's little things like these that reward the dedicated viewer. And the many recurring characters, be they as unimportant as the old lady who says "Kajigger" all the time or as plot-relevant as possibly my favorite recurring characters, the Robot Mafia (CLAMPS!). The show builds a huge universe—literally, the crew goes on adventures all over the damn universe—and it will bring back small elements as cameos or to play key roles (Nibbler and his race being one example).

It's hard to sum up 140 episodes of sci-fi humor in one post, so I thiiiiiiiiink I'm going to stop trying. There's far too much to talk about! So much creativity! So many memes! So much added to the cultural lexicon! It's a great body of work, highly entertaining, all the way to the end.
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: Screaming Trees - All I Know

(7 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

December 30th, 2014


09:53 pm - Of Men and Monsters
I guess I haven't been watching as many movies this year because I've been writing!

Man on Fire: B+Collapse )

Locke: B+Collapse )

Better Luck Tomorrow: B+/A-Collapse )

The Amazing Spider-Man 2: B/B+Collapse )

Frailty: B+/A-Collapse )

The Raid 2: B/B+Collapse )

Godzilla: BCollapse )

The Fault in Our Stars: B+Collapse )

The Wolf of Wall Street: BCollapse )

Jurassic Park III: B+Collapse )

In the Loop: B/B+Collapse )

Bride and Prejudice: B+Collapse )

Wall Street: B+/A-Collapse )

The Grand Budapest Hotel: B+/A-Collapse )

Next up, a random assortment of movies because you never know what to expect from me, if you're even still reading.
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Babymetal - Onedari Daisakusen

(6 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

September 3rd, 2014


08:23 pm - Clone High? More Like Joan, Cry!
After loving Phil Lord and Chris Miller's movie work, I wanted to see that show I'd been hearing about for years anyway before I knew that I would love the movies of the people behind it! That show is Clone High, in case you couldn't tell. What is Clone High about? Well, take it away, Abandoned Pools!

Way way back in the 1980s
Secret government employees
Dug up famous guys and ladies
And made amusing genetic copies
Now their clones are sexy teens
Now they're going to make it if they tried
Loving, learning, sharing, judging
Time to laugh, and shiver and cry


That's right, this is a cartoon about clones of historical figures in high school because WHY NOT. Abe Lincoln, unlike his real-life counterpart, is insecure and awkward, not a natural leader at all. Gandhi is a fast-talking jerk about as far away from original Gandhi as you can get. Joan of Arc is a Jane-from-Daria-esque redhead madly in love with Abe. Cleopatra is the popular Mean Girl, completely full of herself, and JFK is a womanizing lunkhead. These sexy teens have teen angst; meanwhile, in the Principal's office, Principal Scudworth has his own plans for the clones (warning: they are stupid plans). The Scudworth stories are generally the weakest element of the show, as they usually exist independently of the main storylines, but they are worth it for Mr. Butlertron, a sweater-wearing robot who only speaks in two tones and calls everyone Wesley.

As one would expect from the genre-savvy, trope-subverting humor of Lord and Miller's films (as well as Bill Lawrence's TV shows), Clone High revels in skewering the tropes of high school TV shows. Every episode is a "Very Special Episode" of Clone High, and the Previouslies and Next Time Ons are friggin' hilarious. The show takes on hard-hitting topics like ADD, drugs, littering, and makeovers.

Also, it's incredibly quotable:

"I can't stand to not see you not make the biggest mistake of one of our lives!"

"Do you know what hurts the most, Joan? This nail I just stepped on."

"I'm a Kennedy! I'm not accustomed to tragedy!"

"It can’t be true. But then again, it rhymed, so it must be."

The show is just off-the-wall bonkers, with plenty of running gags (for some reason there's a dolphin in every episode) but also some heart! I'll admit it's almost needlessly cruel how much the show torments Joan in playing up Abe's complete and utter cluelessness with regards to her feelings for him, but it's satirizing that whole relationship dynamic in high school shows and leads to some wonderfully self-aware jokes in the finale. Clone High turns everything up to 11 with no regrets, and that's admirable.

Clone High also has a slew of great guest stars (most of the cast of Scrubs, for instance), some dated and some timeless, such as "Michael J. Fox as Gandhi's remaining kidney," which tells you everything you need to know about this show, probably. It has a fairly sincere indie rock soundtrack, which is cute, and the theme song is super catchy. There's plenty of cloned historical figure humor.

Honestly, I don't think I have to write a review to sell Clone High. It's fucking called Clone High. Watch it!
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Poe - Walk the Walk

(5 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

August 27th, 2014


12:10 am - Worldcon 2014: The Totally Abridged Edition
Last year's Worldcon in idyllic San Antonio was a life-changing experience, but this year's Worldcon in idyllic London was the experience of a lifetime!

I totally met Kieron Gillen in the Comics Unmasked exhibit through the power of Twitter. I totally thought our hotel reservation was for Wednesday but it was totally for Thursday. Amy totally saved me by letting me crash with her. Her butter chicken totally tasted like butter and my "green chili" naan was totally just naan with cilantro chutney. Rina totally gave me British cream soda. A literary agent totally asked me if I was from India. Someone totally recognized me from my Twitter icon. Everyone totally recognized me from my Twitter icon.

I totally woke up earlier than necessary to sign up for Kaffeeklatsches but I totally signed up for all the people I wanted to see. I totally met John Hornor Jacobs as he was checking in for our room. The gaming tent totally had GIANT PANDEMIC and GIANT TICKET TO RIDE. The Harry Potter-themed Opening Ceremonies were totally adorable. Listening to Lauren Beukes talk about writing and her career was totally inspiring. Emma Newman totally told us she was going to Kickstart the fourth Split Worlds book before she told everyone else. I was totally afraid of Peter Newman because he sounds so much like Latimer on Tea and Jeopardy. Mur Lafferty has totally arrived since someone at her Literary Beer did not even know she did podcasts. I was totally a cyborg cat with a lobster hat. I totally met Andrea Phillips in the gaming tent and Foz Meadows in the Helsinki tent. In the span of five minutes I totally ran into a Twitter friend, Julia, Moss, Miriam, Kate Elliott, Rhiannon Rasmussen-Silverstein, and Sarah Rees Brennan, which was TOTALLY WORLDCON. Mark totally wasn't sure whether he was allowed to say "eyefucking." Mary Robinette Kowal totally took a DeLorean to the Retro Hugos. I totally geeked out about the Mahabharata with Max Gladstone. The Lee Harris-hosted Sorry I Haven't a Clue was totally hilarious. Emma Newman totally sang "I Would Do Anything for Love" to the tune of "I'm a Believer." Paul Cornell totally made up clever fake headlines. Cat Valente and Seanan totally share a brain. Victoria Schwab and I totally spent half her reading talking about Edinburgh and Nashville. Amal El-Mohtar was totally excited to meet me because she totally didn't know I would be there. I had totally been a little face on Twitter and now I was totally a real person. Everyone was totally at the Fan Village bar. Julia totally signed my copy of Kaleidoscope and was totally sure she would be seeing more from me because she totally knew I could write. Andrea totally got a promotion but Wesley Chu was totally smug about not having a day job anymore. I totally met people from Twitter everywhere I went.

I totally chatted with Lauren Beukes as we Strolled with the Stars. Paul Cornell and Mary Anne Mohanraj were totally interviewed by the Guardian alfresco. Amy totally thinks the hot new thing that everyone is writing now that will be so wrong in 75 years is QUANTUM EVERYTHING. Emma Newman totally thinks of Twitter as a giant pub. Justin Landon totally taught Emma how to high-five. Goldeen Ogawa was totally my favorite person on the Diversity in Comics panel. I totally congratulated Tansy Rayner Roberts on her Best Fan Writer Hugo a year late. I totally got my Kaleidoscope signed by four more authors at the release party. Foz totally ate a lollipop with a fucking scorpion inside it. Amal El-Mohtar made a totally brilliant comparison between stories and sculptures to illustrate non-Western modes of storytelling. I was totally excited to be on a panel with Gavia Baker-Whitelaw from the Daily Dot, whom I got to know through the totally circuitous route of liking her comments on Noelle Stevenson's Twitter. We totally discussed fandom interaction with writers and actors for ninety minutes and it was totally fun. I totally mentioned Hannibal over and over. I totally didn't know the moderator of the panel was one of my Twitter followers. A Twitter friend and I were totally wearing the same Veronica Mars Kickstarter shirt. The tiki Dalek would totally destroy the Cybermen with one cocktail. Julia totally ran her panel about what teens like to read by asking actual teens to tell us what they liked to read. Carl Engle-Laird totally invited me to join his dinner table where we totally discussed the Hugos. Mint Leaves chicken tikka masala totally did not taste like chicken tikka masala but it was totally the best food in the ExCel. The food at the SFWA Reception was totally bewildering. You can totally go wrong with box wine. Ellen Datlow totally doesn't like the term "sci-fi." I totally told her my whole writing life story and she totally introduced me to perennial Fan Writer winner David Langford. I totally met a million people from Codex with cool Codex stickers on their badges. Being Amy's +1 totally helped my writing career. Sarah Rees Brennan and I had briefly met but totally did not exchange political views. Sarah was totally fucking delightful and told several totally wonderful stories. She totally got into trouble with the police in Mexico and attracted serial killers in graveyards. Everyone totally knows me as that guy who wrote about that fucking Nebulas panel. Stiles from One Direction totally has four nipples. Foz totally joined Mark for his late night event. Mark totally ruined everything for everyone for three hours.

I totally geeked out about Orphan Black to a completely full room of Orphan Black fans. A fellow panelist totally made me see a character in a more positive light. I totally dropped some show trivia that I totally thought was common knowledge but totally made the audience go "Wow." Emma Newman's Fear and Writing workshop totally drudged up an unpleasant memory that almost made me cry but everyone else was totally emotional and teary too. Mary Robinette Kowal totally joined me for lunch and we totally exchanged emotional stories. She totally gave me her new fancy business card for people she wants to keep in touch with. I totally stopped to say hi to Seanan on the way to Mary's reading and there was totally only one seat left when I got here. I totally gave it to another woman in case she'd never seen Mary before ever. I totally appreciated the Organization for Transformative Works tent and totally chilled out in there a few times. Zen Cho was totally charming in the South and Southeast Asian SFF panel. Game of Thrones is totally like Pakistani politics. I totally signed up for Zen Cho's Kaffeeklatsch because she was so totally charming. Robert Jackson Bennett totally failed to murder me and instead totally gave me an ARC of City of Stairs. Kate Elliott was totally proud of her understanding the rules of Gloom. Samson the Bearded Man totally got married twice. The panelists on the Cornetto Trilogy panel totally ate Cornettos during the panel. Carl totally quoted me in his panel about the Hugo short fiction nominees. The moderator of our New Supers panel totally introduced herself as "annoying." We totally did not talk about anything we discussed over e-mail but it was totally fun to chat about superhero comics with Mike Carey. Someone in the audience totally thought I was "utterly charming." I am totally dead to Mike Carey because I haven't read anything by him. Tobias Buckell totally wears that hat. He totally wore that hat and told us a hilarious story about Dave Truesdale. I totally met The Book Smugglers. A blogger totally took a picture of my S.H.I.E.L.D./HYDRA shirt. She totally asked where she could read me and I totally gave her my card. All the cool kids were totally at Seanan's concert. Rhiannon totally gave me Chocolate Creme Oreos to make up for a totally bland chicken sandwich. I totally wanted to take a picture with Sarah Rees Brennan because I thought she was delightful and she totally wanted to take a picture with me because she thought I was delightful. John Hornor Jacobs totally put me on the list for the Gollancz party but they totally weren't checking by the time I arrived. Miriam is totally a jerk who's read Charlie Jane Anders's book. My notes totally say "Bennett weirdo" and I totally don't know what that could possibly be referring to. Two women thought it would sound totally weird but they totally heard about me from Seanan and Mark and I sounded cool and they totally saw me on panels and I seemed cool so they totally wanted to say hi.

They were totally playing Quidditch in the Fan Village. I totally wore a llama shirt in honor of Kameron Hurley. I totally let the women talk more about feminism and magical girl. Miriam totally had notes. All of our imaginations have totally been colonized by the dominant narrative. Someone totally tried to whitesplain Diversity in YA panel and they totally wouldn't have it. My recommendation of Kaleidoscope totally caused a run on sales. I totally let the smarter people talk more about secrecy in science. I was totally the corporate shill. Sarah Rees Brennan totally had the longest signing line. Charles Stross's reading was totally full and I totally camped out in front of the room to get him to sign my book. I totally held a Hugo and it was totally heavy. Zen Cho's Kaffeeklatsch totally turned into a mini panel/discussion on the Malaysian education system and gender bias in fiction. I looked totally dashing in my suit and Amy looked totally lovely in her dress for the Hugos. I totally did not talk to Peter Davison at the reception because I'd totally never seen any Five episodes but Cat Valente totally fangirled him. I totally met David Tennant and he totally smiled when I said I loved him in Blackpool. I totally chatted casually with D.B. Weiss but totally sounded like a blithering idiot to David Benioff. Men were totally wearing rainbow ties. We totally sat one row behind GRRM and two rows in front of David Tennant. Kameron Hurley totally wrote great speeches. Cory Doctorow totally wore a cape and goggles. I totally saw David Tennant laugh at a scene from "The Day of the Doctor." Sad Puppies were totally sad. I totally never talked to GRRM at all. Someone totally brought a robot as their +1. I totally wished Andrea Phillips and I had spent more time together so we totally did that then. I totally introduced Andrea to Sarah Rees Brennan. People were totally showing my gentlemen dinosaurs tie to other people. John totally wondered whether I ever slept.

More than three people totally showed up for Kate Elliott's reading. Kate should totally read audiobooks. The Compleat Wrks of Wllm Shkspr (Abridged) was a totally hilarious way to end Worldcon. Chatting with people in the lobby and meeting more people from Twitter was a totally chill way to end Worldcon. Running into people on the Metro platform and riding the DLR with a co-panelist and audience member was a totally nice way to end Worldcon. My hostel room was totally smaller than my hotel room. I totally met Mark Does Stuff mods and was totally met by Mark Does Stuff readers. My peas were totally mushy. Mark is totally not your fucking Google. I totally gave Mark the gift of explaining a Gurren Lagann reference in "Gurren Jesus." Mark totally had to explain who Chester Cheetah was to British people. I am totally too old to stay in hostels.

I totally had an English breakfast on my last day in London again. I totally smuggled blackcurrant squash again. I was totally randomly selected for secondary screening. Mark and Johnny were totally on my flight home. I totally finished Zen Cho's story collection and read Daryl Gregory's novella. I totally need to write more fiction.
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: Howling Bells - Low Happening

(2 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

July 29th, 2014


04:53 pm - Comic-Con 2014: The Totally Abridged Edition
I think I did fewer awesome things in general at this year's Comic-Con, but I think I also got more sleep and was less stressed, so it evens out.

I totally went through the TSA Pre-Check line in Oakland and it was glorious. A package from John Joseph Adams containing tons of WDSF postcards to hand out and a signed copy of Robot Uprisings was totally waiting for me at the hotel. We totally ran into Rachel Caine on our way to pick up badges. I totally traded my Arrow bag for an iZombie bag. I totally waited ninety minutes in the Marvel merch line to buy things for friends so I totally bought myself an awesome S.H.I.E.L.D./HYDRA shirt. I totally greenscreened myself into the Guardians of the Galaxy lineup. I totally got an exclusive Gloom promo card that only works for an expansion I don't have. John Layman totally remembered me from Twitter and meeting him every year. I totally bought a gold foil cover of "Warrior Chicken Poyo" for me and Alisha. I totally congratulated David Mack on having an awesome art show and a bigass art book. Maya and Liz and Becca and Helen and I totally met at the ruins of Pinkberry. Maya totally complimented Liz on her awesome skirt without realizing who she was. Maya totally went home because she was totally going to get in the Ballroom 20 line super early, and we totally went to Chocolat Cremerie for crepes and gelato. For dinner I totally had a Nutella crepe with strawberry gelato and a side of casual racism.

The Vanellope cosplayer who built her own car was totally one of the best cosplays I saw all weekend. Maya and I totally snagged seats right next to the microphone and totally warned off dozens of people from sitting in seats with a totally obstructed view. I totally ran into Christy's friend Brigit and then totally met my Twitter friend Amber. Kiefer Sutherland is totally charming and probably never points guns at people and yells. I totally kept taking bathroom passes to go down to the exhibit hall during panels. Cody Vrosh totally recognized me from buying two ties from him and I totally bought a third one to wear to the Hugos. I totally met Ben H. Winters and got him to sign all three Last Policeman books, which I am totally excited to read. Rachelle LeFevre was totally dressed as Starbuck. I totally got Roc Upchurch to sign every character in a special fold-out cover of Rat Queens #6 for me and a totally cool tea party poster for Alisha. On my way back to Ballroom 20 I totally ran into Emily because that is what totally happens to me at Comic-Con. I totally walked into a scene in the pilot of Scorpion where people were literally hacking a plane by physically connecting a laptop to it while driving a few feet underneath it. Robert Patrick thinks you should totally be scared of him. Reign totally does not care about historical accuracy but Adelaide Kane is totally delightful. Dino Stamatopoulos totally hawked his graphic novel Trent again. I totally don't know whether he has a public persona or he is actually that much of a weirdo. Dan Harmon is totally glad he can finally push that anti-vaxx message he couldn't do on NBC. HuffPo totally Tweeted about Dan Harmon's "long monologue" and Dan totally read it out loud. Gillian Jacobs totally kept interrupting everyone and Jim Rash totally put her in time-out. I totally told Jim Rash I loved The Descendants and The Way Way Back, and Aprotim totally cheered for my very existence but tried to pass it off as enthusiasm for the movies. I totally asked Dan Harmon how they keep a consistent narrative when they jump genres every week, and Dan Harmon totally doesn't know. They totally blow their own minds. Two Human Beings totally tried to ask a question. Helen was totally Catwoman. I totally ran into mycenae on her way out of Ballroom 20 because we always find each other every year without fail even though we never plan it. The shrieking of the Teen Wolf fandom totally made my ears bleed. The Teen Wolf Q&A line totally formed so quickly that the fandom should totally be harnessed as a source of energy. A girl totally broke down crying talking to Dylan O'Brien and he totally came down to give her his placard and a hug. Jonathan Ross was totally a good moderator in comparison to the several terrible moderators for previous panels. Bryan Fuller totally considers himself and his crew "Thomas Harris mash-up DJs." Chilton is totally not dead. I totally thanked Caroline Dhavernas and Bryan Fuller for Jaye Tyler and said that Jaye Tyler was my Ravenstag and Caroline Dhavernas totally said, "Aw." I totally asked Bryan Fuller if anime had influenced the style of Hannibal and it totally had. I totally got a Wonderfalls shirt and a wax lion and a signed Hannibal poster for asking a question. Raul Esparza totally tried to match his face on the screen with a woman wearing a Raul Esparza mask. The Hannibal panel was overall totally amazing with totally hilarious and insightful Q&A. I totally cloned myself. Jackson Lanzing totally introduced me to his Boom! editor and welcomed me to the wide wide world of writers. I totally geeked out about Korra with Noelle Stevenson. I totally met Carrie Sessarego, who is totally going to write an introduction to my first published short story. Cinnamon lemonade is totally a thing that exists. I totally finally met Tonya's sister Rebecca at Nerd HQ. Aprotim and I totally climbed a skyscraper for reals. I totally listened to Linkin Park from the gate.

I totally wanted to grab Discount Armageddon from a girl and get Seanan to sign it for her. I totally got my signing tickets from Image with no problem thanks to Seanan's ~*disability privilege*~. I totally bought Rae a variant Ghostbusters print from Gallery 1988, acquired a poster tube, and shipped it to her because I am totally a Comic-Con Favor Ninja. Brian K. Vaughan is totally super nice. He totally has a childhood friend named Sunil Patel and he totally wrote a message in my Y: The Last Man trade and called me his pal. He totally destroyed my theory that he was responsible for the Lost team negotiating an end date when he arrived. Matt Fraction totally recognized me from Twitter and said he liked my e-presence. Chip Zdarsky totally felt me up for our picture. I totally met Hal Lublin a.k.a. Steve Carlsberg. I totally lost Gloom but I will totally be in Tigermonkey's triumphant vlog of our game. Thumbelisa is totally having an affair with Mister Giggles. We totally consulted Keith Baker himself on a rules question. Discovering her through the Machine of Death podcast recordings is totally Nika Harper's favorite origin story. John Scalzi totally gave me a high five for selling my first story. You should totally make it a Scalzi Summer. Patrick Rothfuss was totally there. Jeffrey Cranor totally said it was nice to see me but I totally did not know there was a huge line for the Night Vale signing. I totally walked right into the Fiona Staples panel. Fiona Staples's favorite color is totally yellow. Brian K. Vaughan totally asks Fiona Staples what creatures and worlds she would like to draw and whether there should be more jokes. I totally ran into Greg van Eekhout in Sails Pavilion and met his wife. He totally introduced me as That Guy Who Spoke Out About That Nebulas Panel. I totally waited in the Marvel merch line again to get sophia_helix a female Thor tumbler. A man totally wanted a men's female Thor shirt to show his support and I totally handed him a Women Destroy Science Fiction postcard. I totally walked all the way to the Manchester Grand Hyatt and up four floors to get totally awesome Hannibal swag: an exclusive DVD sleeve and soundtrack sampler. I totally chatted with some attendees and gave them Comic-Con tips and my card. One girl was totally impressed with the stripes on the back. My traditional Asian fusion dinner with Erin totally continued the tradition of good food and bad service. I totally went to the Hilton Bayfront to see Greg van Eekhout and other writers and instead totally found the post-Eisners crowd. Amy Dallen is totally embarrassed that the origin story of our friendship involves her cutting in line. I just totally chilled with Matt Fraction like we were buds and he totally introduced me to someone. Brian K. Vaughan totally said it was nice to see me again and shook my hand. Cecil Castelluci totally remembered meeting me at that same panel where I met Margaret Dunlap and Sarah Watson and other Middlefolk. Matt Fraction totally noticed when I looked like my Twitter icon. Gabriel Bá and Fabio Moon were totally there too. I totally told Kelly Sue DeConnick that I loved her WDSF interview and I liked her as a person. I totally introduced Dahlia to Brian K. Vaughan. Fiona Staples totally thanked me for sitting through the Eisners even though I didn't. Dahlia totally knows Amy Dallen. Noelle Stevenson totally waved to me out on the dark balcony.

I totally got in line way too early for Room 7AB but totally got a front-row seat. Dahlia totally caught up on the last three issues of Saga in preparation for the panel. A kid totally asked to borrow my Saga #21 to catch up himself. Dahlia totally knew that kid's mom. I totally met Greg Weisman and said I was a huge Gargoyles fan. Sherri L. Smith was totally awesome on the Diversity in Genre Lit panel and now I totally want to read Orleans. Gene Luen Yang totally said that even if you don't care about diversity on a political or social level, you should totally care about it on a craft level because you can totally tell more interesting stories. Brent Spiner totally pretended to be Matthew McCounaghey and did the Data head tilt. We totally saw a cute robot named Jimmy and were totally advised not to download the World Domination app. Robots totally run on the Robot Operating System (ROS). Daniel H. Wilson totally mused on whatever is nukier than a nuke. Fiona Staples totally spoiled the last three issues of Saga ten minutes into the panel. Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples totally give each other credit where credit is due and maybe even when credit is not due. I totally asked Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples about the challenges of writing Hazel. An older woman across the aisle wearing a Lying Cat shirt was totally excited to see another person wearing a Lying Cat shirt, and a man at that. I totally gave no shits about the Endgame panel but it was totally bullshit that James Frey was on the panel and his co-writer was in the audience. The Strong Female Characters panel was not totally transcendent but I totally enjoyed it. Fiona Staples totally designed a robot groin that looked too much like a vagina. Sara Mayhew totally defended the aspects of Bella Swann that appealed to young girls but totally wanted a more fleshed-out character. My Twitter friend Hallie totally saved me a sweet spot in the Daniel H. Wilson line. Daniel H. Wilson totally did not guarantee my safety from the sentient robots but he totally gave me a free copy of Robogenesis. Seth Green totally passed us. It was totally Hallie's first celebrity sighting. I totally thanked Jim Cheung for Kate Bishop. I totally met Janet K. Lee, artist of The Wonderland Alphabet, which is totally becoming my default baby gift the way Gloom is totally my default wedding gift. I totally saw Lamb for the first time in years. Two girls I met at the Veronica Mars Fan Event last year were totally in the Rob Thomas signing line. Rob totally gave me real-life congratulations on my first sale. I totally talked about my first experience with the Machine of Death game with David Malki ! I totally got five separate Hacktivist autographs on five separate occasions. I totally ran into Tavis on my way out of the convention center. Olivia totally rocked that pink wig. Royal India is totally becoming somewhat of a Comic-Con tradition. Carrie and Doc and Olivia and I totally maybe had dinner next to the Black Ranger. I totally had a celebratory milkshake at Ghirardelli. Margaret totally declared my suggestion of the collective noun "a jackass of Hitlers" to be the quality of wit she would expect from a published writer. I was totally too tired to go to SlamCon.

I totally had crunchy French toast for breakfast. I totally had an even easier time getting tickets for the Image signing and totally made it to the Marvel merch line before they capped it. I totally got the autograph of a security guard. I totally waited over ninety minutes to get a Captain America hoodie for a friend. Maya totally told Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples that I got her into Saga. Brian K. Vaughan totally said, "Sunil! Hey!" and signed my first Saga trade with "Your pal." An adorable kid totally asked Pseudonymous Bosch if that was his real name. I totally got an ARC of Bad Magic just for waiting in line for the signing. I totally told Pseudonymous Bosch the story of how I discovered his books and he was totally hipster cool about it. Jules Rivera was totally awesome on the Superheroines: Power, Responsibility, and Representation panel and now I totally want to read Valkyrie Squad. The panel was totally half women of color. Dr. Andrea Letamendi totally turned the American Ninja Warrior story into a metaphor for women's struggles. I totally told them it was one of the best panels at the con. Stephen Blackmoore totally said, "Hey, I know that guy!" when he saw me. A man totally turned to me and asked if I was Sunil Patel, and it was totally one of my Genius Loci TOCmates. I totally almost missed meeting Stephen Blackmoore but we were glad to confirm that we were both real people. I totally found Kate at the Disney/Hyperion booth and bothered her until too many people wanted to buy books. I totally saved her a seat in 6DE for the Harry Potter fan panel. Mark totally found about Mallory Ortberg's "Harry Potter and the Philosophies of Objectivism" and read from it right there. Mark totally thanked me for getting him to meet Mallory on his birthday. The panel totally became 100% about Ronbledore for a few minutes. Maya totally showed off her shirt. Mark was totally afraid Helen was going to ask him a trolly question but we totally left that up to Maya, who totally asked whether, if Harry went to Detroit City, he would be with Batman or Robocop. Mark totally did not answer the question. One of the panelists totally used to follow me on LiveJournal. I totally ate a chocolate pie from a Mark Does Stuff person dressed as Ned the Piemaker. I totally invited this stranger and non-stranger Helen up to my room and to dinner. We totally marveled at a man's ability to pack seven dolls into one box and have it not cost seven times the shipping for one doll. I totally payed $9.75 to ship home a free poster. Mojo Jojo and his robot minions were totally Irish stepping in the Irish pub. Olivia totally said I would be punished. Seanan and Olivia totally plotted to murder me. That night they totally smothered me with pillows.

Hallie totally sat behind Seanan and Olivia and me on our flight home.
Current Mood: stressedstressed
Current Music: Dido - See You When You're 40

(5 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

July 20th, 2014


11:00 am - Revolutionary Girl Utena? More Like Fence Fence Revolution!
I was first recommended Revolutionary Girl Utena after watching Princess Tutu (obligatory PRINCESS TUTU IS THE BEST OMG) seven years ago, and I've been wanting to watch it ever since! While I wasn't able to watch it to follow along with Mark Watches Utena, I was put on a Worldcon panel about feminism and magical girls so now watching it became research.

When Utena Tenjou was a little girl, she met a prince, and the prince gave her a ring and told her to be noble, and she decided that when she grew up, she was going to be a prince. Not a princess, a prince. Now, as a teenager, she's at Ohtori Academy, and she discovers that her ring marks her as a Duelist, like the members of the Student Council, who duel for possession of the Rose Bride, Anthy Hememiya, who, as they have been told by "End of the World" (whatever or whoever the fuck that is), will grant them the power to bring revolution to the world.

You guys, this is the first episode.

On a superficial level, Utena is confusing and repetitive. Literally minutes of every episode are taken up with reused sequences either leading up to duels or transformations during duels—or, later...other things. Episodes begin to feel incredibly formulaic, designed to be written around these plots, and character motivations can feel muddled, more like "Welp, this character has not yet dueled Utena, so let's give them a very flimsy reason to do so" rather than anything approaching actual human feelings. Also, a great deal of what is shown onscreen makes so little sense it's unclear whether it's even real, from random kangaroos to, well, anything that happens in the dueling arena.

But Utena, like a lot of anime, speaks in metaphors and symbolism and emotions: deeper, emotional truths take priority over logic. I don't normally see subtext but this is the most homoerotic anime I have ever seen, a show where the subtext is practically text. At times, I wasn't even sure non-incestuous heterosexuality existed in this world. Oh, yes, homoerotic subtext, incestuous subtext, there is a lot of subtext here. There's bizarre sexual tension between siblings like it's not even weird. Sometimes the men just lie around with pretty hair and bare chests because that's what real men do, I guess. And this is a high school show so of course HORMONES, everyone is fucking. As a result, a lot of characters are driven by jealousy and competition for men or women, and it's simply turned up to anime levels. There is a lot going on about gender and sexuality, and the general theme is basically FUCK THE PATRIARCHY, as Utena consistently rejects traditional gender roles, from choosing to be a prince to wearing the boys' uniform at school. Roses symbolize lust, there are phallic symbols everywhere, who even knows how much meaning is really buried in this show beneath all the fucked-up manipulation and deceit.

It took me a while to really get into the series, and it probably wasn't until more than halfway through that I really got into it, as the plot began to thicken in more and more incoherent and coherent ways. And while I wasn't entirely satisfied by the ending, I think it's more a matter of my not having properly followed the story. Which is difficult to follow. Revolutionary Girl Utena is a challenging show, but with its strong focus on character relationships—particularly between Utena and Anthy—and thematics, it's ultimately rewarding.
Current Mood: dirtydirty
Current Music: Howling Bells - Slowburn

(8 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

July 15th, 2014


11:37 pm - Comic-Con Condensation Collation Capitulation!
Maybe I can be more prepared than last year! Or maybe not.

(Last Updated: Monday, July 21, 1:16 PM)

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As usual, once I find out signings, everything will get EVEN WORSE, and I don't really know what should be green and red. I made some things red just to mock myself. In any case, let's see if I can have a fun, not too stressful time! I am going to get to see a lot of friends and meet people from the Internet!!
Current Mood: anxiousanxious
Current Music: Frou Frou - Breathe In

(6 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

June 23rd, 2014


08:19 pm - Win Some, Lose Some
The last batch mixed old and new, but this time I focused almost entirely on movies from 2013. MY REACTIONS WERE MIXED.

Before Midnight: A-Collapse )

Blue Jasmine: B+Collapse )

Short Term 12: A-/ACollapse )

Synecdoche, New York: C+/B-Collapse )

In a World...: B/B+Collapse )

Now You See Me: B-/BCollapse )

Fruitvale Station: B+Collapse )

You"re Next: B+Collapse )

Monsters University: B+Collapse )

A Good Day to Die Hard: B-Collapse )

Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2: B+Collapse )

The Way Way Back: B+/A-Collapse )

The Spectacular Now: B/B+Collapse )

Next up, various movies I've been recommended and I am finally getting around to, plus more new movies! The usual, then.
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Sohodolls - Stripper

(11 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

June 19th, 2014


10:32 pm - Orange Is the New Black? More Like Red Is the New White!
Once again, the Internet was right: Orange Is the New Black is fucking fantastic. Mixing the cheeky humor of Weeds with the prison drama of Oz, it creates something fresh and original (based on a memoir).

Everything's going great for Piper Chapman: she's white, she's blonde, she's pretty, she's well off, she's engaged, she's arrested, wait, hold up, that's not supposed to happen. Just like that, a torrid lesbian relationship with a drug runner comes back to haunt her, and she's sentenced to a year in a women's prison in Litchfield. Piper is the audience's POV character, a fish out of water, and she is our gateway to a cast unlike any other on television: women, women, women, of all colors and sizes and backgrounds. White women, black women, Latina women, Chinese woman, Japanese-Scottish woman, transwoman, it's basically unreal. I loved how different everyone looked, not just from the usual women you see on television but also from each other. And even better, they sounded different; so many different (literal) voices on this show, from Morello's hybrid East Coast accent to Miss Claudette's authoritarian Caribbean accent, from Yoga Jones's Patty Mayonnaise voice to Miss Rosa's husky voice.

Although the show is ostensibly Piper's story, it's the stories surrounding her that are the most compelling. And there are so many because everyone has one. Todd VanDerWerff calls Orange Is the New Black one of the most empathetic shows in the history of television, and he's right: this show cares about its characters. Everyone is a person, for better or for worse. Through flashbacks, we learn how the characters ended up in prison, and many—perhaps too many—are victims of circumstance, committing crimes to get out of a bad situation, usually for love, familial or romantic. The show does not absolve them of guilt or responsibility, but, again, it empathizes with them. Even the few male characters, most of whom are pretty terrible people, are drawn well enough that we understand why they're terrible and, in some cases, even feel the teensiest bit bad for them. In the end, nearly everyone's story boils down to a story of identity: who are you? Who were you out of prison? Who are you in prison? Which is the real you? And what kind of power does it give you to answer that question?

I could wax rhapsodic about how much I love all the characters, about how Taystee is the best because she loves Harry Potter, about how Crazy Eyes lives up to her name but isn't just a joke, about how I have never seen an episode of television like the one focused on Sophia, a transwoman. I could marvel at how intricately plotted the show is, especially in its second season, where multiple character arcs interweave and converge upon each other. I could point out the major flaw, which is Larry, Piper's fiancé, who is supposed to be our eyes on the outside to show what Piper is missing, how the world moves on without her, but instead makes us wish the show would get back to Litchfield already.

I could do all of these things, but you've got 26 episodes on Netflix sitting right there, waiting to be watched.
Current Mood: fullfull
Current Music: Jets Overhead - Blue Is Red

(5 memoirs | Describe me as "inscrutable")

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